Embarrassed

Ever sincre I posted that picture of me with a puffy face, I have been really embarrassed that anyone is seeing me like that. I am trying to focus on the fact that I do not look like that anymore, and have been slowly losing weight over the past few months.

To be honest, though, I have not been impressed with my metabolism since starting Synthroid, and sadly, after doing a lot of research - I am by far not the only woman who has been having trouble losing weight with it. I am crossing my fingers in hope that I will be one of the few women who are able to lose weight with it. We will see. Until then, I am continuing to strive to work out for 60 minutes five times a week and sticking to my strict anti-inflammatory diet. I have slowly been adopting to it and definitely feel better.

I purchased all of the supplements my doctor recommended and am now taking around 20 pills a day!

1. One Synthroid Tablet
2. Five Fish Oil Tablets
3. Five Ayurvedic Boswellian Tablets
4. Six Botanical Treasures Supplements
5. 3 Magnesium Stearate Tablets
6. One Multi-vitamin

That is 21 pills total!!!

I was just looking up one of my placements in my Natal Chart and was looking at Chiron in Aries in the Sixth house. Apparently, health issues is a big thing for me in this lifetime. I am also positioned to become a healer to others who suffer from the same issues as me. The only way I can make sense of this happening to me is to believe that it is for a reason, and that I am evolving to eat a very healthy diet. Really, I have no choice or I am going to just keep getting worse.

One of the most difficult things for me to deal with is the idea that I have gotten a disease which basically shuts down my metabolism. That is in a lot of ways my worst fear come true. I have always been obsessive about my weight and have stuggled with eating disorders for most of my life. The idea of living my life continually gaining weight with no way of losing it no matter how much I diet or exercise is uncomprehensible to me. To be honest I would rather not live at all of I were to have to live like that.

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Long Distance Healing Voyage

So I went to a Doctor who practices Integrative Medicine yesterday and was diagnosed with (1) Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (2) Milk Allergy (3) Hashimoto's Thyroiditis (4) Hypothyroidism &  (5) Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Also, it became apparent that the long term tooth infection I suffered in 2006 and 2007 from an incomplete root canal my incompetent dentist in Maryland performed compromised my immune system so much that combined with the Milk Allergy and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - my health has gotten pretty screwed up and is going to take some time and effort to fix.

Honestly, right now I am very depressed and in a lot of emotional and physical pain.

My doctor and I worked out a wellness plan which includes, diet, exercise, Ayurvedic herbs + botanicals and other various vitamin and mineral supplements, a bunch of blood tests to detail any insufficiencies, an order for an Adrenals test, and setting up some appointments for some EMDR sessions to treat my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

Hopefully the year 2009 will be the year that I finally heal from these issues and get well.

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Day 11: Synthroid

Well, it has been eleven days since I started taking Thyroid hormone replacement medicine and despite my skepticism I have noticed remarkable improvements. When I wake up in the morning my body feels snuggly and rested laying in my bed - not heavy, tired, and depressed. My depression has gotten NOTICEABLY better. I am not having negative thoughts all of the time and sad feelings. I have hope for the future instead of worrying all of the time. I feel less bloated, like maybe I have lost a couple of pounds. My muscles are not really hurting anymore... although as I type this my back and shoulder seems kind of achy. I have more energy, but I cannot say that I feel completely normal yet. I am also experiencing constipation (is that too much information) so until that symptom is relieved I am not declaring synthroid a wonder drug yet.

I started my elimination diet last weekend and it is going well. I have not drank coffee, nor eaten wheat gluten, dairy foods, sugar,  soy, alcohol, or any of the other foods on my 'no-no' list. I do feel better. Even though the nutritionist suggested I follow this diet for three months, I might consider following it indefinitely if I get used to it and feel great on it. I have known for a long time that all of those "bad" foods were not good for me, so why start eating them again regularly if I can help it? The only problem with this diet is eating out...it greatly reduces my options.  But then again, it is also a blessing in disguise. I have wanted to stop eating out for a while now. I will save SO MUCH MONEY. Since I want to buy a house by the end of the year, it seems like the smart thing to do. Health and wealth? Sounds like a good plan to me.

I go to the Nutritionist on Monday - will give an update about what he says afterwards.

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So I Found Out What Is Causing My Health Problems

On Monday I decided to finally go to the hospital and get my blood test to see if I have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. To my dismay, on Wednesday morning I got a call from the Endocrinologist to set up an appointment to talk to me about my results. I asked the receptionist if my thyroid anti-bodies were high and she said yes - although she did not have the authority to give me my diagnosis. I am pretty sure that it means that I have it. That really sucks, but at least I know now what the root cause of my:

• depression
• cold intolerance
• constipation
• leg cramps
• ten pounds that I cannot seem to lose
• bad memory
• poor concentration
• panic attacks

The bad news is that traditional medicine says that there is no cure for Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, and that I should take synthetic thyroid hormone replacement medicine the rest of my life. The good  news is that my landlord is an alternative medicine practitioner and she said that she has treated many people for this disease and all of them are doing well, without having to take the hormones. I am meeting with her this weekend, so she can evaluate what I need to do to start getting better.

This condition has been coming on for the last few years. I have known that there was something wrong with me, although I did not know what it was or what I needed to do to get better. At least now I feel like I finally know what is causing the problem, and that is half the battle. Even though it is daunting to face an illness for which there supposedly no cure, I believe that I will find a way somehow. It is probably going to involve a big change in my diet, and I am going to have to continue the exercise regimen I have been undertaking for the past month permanently, but that is okay. I just want to get better.

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Soy and My Thyroid Gland

So last week I went to the doctor because my thyroid gland was swollen and I felt like I had a lump in my throat. The doctor said I probably have some sort of thyroid disorder and will more than likely be put on synthetic thyroid medication that I would have to take the rest of my life. Forget that! I went into panic mode and started reading like crazy. I am not giving up that easily.

I did a bunch of research and found that it is probably all the soy in my diet that is causing my thyroid gland to have problems. I really have been eating way too much soy ever since I became a vegetarian. For the past eight years I have excessively drank soy milk, eaten soy cheese, tofu, tempeh, soy butter, soy ice cream, imitation meats made from soy, soy chips... if it is made of soy you can safely bet I have been eating it. A lot.

From what I have been reading, soy is considered a "goitrogen" a food which inhibits the uptake of iodine by the thyroid gland. The thyroid gland emits hormones which control our metabolism, amongst other things.

So basically, because of all of the soy I eat, and because I use sea salt instead of iodized table salt, I have an iodine deficiency and my thyroid gland has been screaming for help. It has not been able to do its job and I have been developing a condition known as hypothyroidism - which causes, fatique, depression, heavy menstrual periods, weight gain - even tooth problems(!) because the thyroid is also in charge some sort of calcium processes in our bodies.

Last friday, I stopped eating soy foods and started taking an iodine supplement. I feel 100% better! My thyroid gland is not swollen anymore and I have a lot more energy and am not as depressed.

Yesterday I rode my bike to go get my lunch (yay!) and tonight I am starting my new yoga class. Hopefully it is just a matter of time before my tooth completely heals and no more headaches...

I still cannot get over that the doctor did not ask me about my diet or come anywhere near the conclusion that I have an iodine deficiency. In fact, when I asked the nurse if that could be the problem and she said 'no'.

Instead of soy milk I am now drinking almond milk, hazelnut milk, and hemp milk. I am also having a pineapple smoothie for breakfast every morning (pineapple has iodine) and am going to try to start eating more sea kelp (sushi!!!). I am probably not going to completely eliminate ALL soy products, but I am definitely drastically cutting back.

The interesting thing is that I have been reading in health articles to avoid soy for a long time... now I think I know why. :)

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