Embarrassed

Ever sincre I posted that picture of me with a puffy face, I have been really embarrassed that anyone is seeing me like that. I am trying to focus on the fact that I do not look like that anymore, and have been slowly losing weight over the past few months.

To be honest, though, I have not been impressed with my metabolism since starting Synthroid, and sadly, after doing a lot of research - I am by far not the only woman who has been having trouble losing weight with it. I am crossing my fingers in hope that I will be one of the few women who are able to lose weight with it. We will see. Until then, I am continuing to strive to work out for 60 minutes five times a week and sticking to my strict anti-inflammatory diet. I have slowly been adopting to it and definitely feel better.

I purchased all of the supplements my doctor recommended and am now taking around 20 pills a day!

1. One Synthroid Tablet
2. Five Fish Oil Tablets
3. Five Ayurvedic Boswellian Tablets
4. Six Botanical Treasures Supplements
5. 3 Magnesium Stearate Tablets
6. One Multi-vitamin

That is 21 pills total!!!

I was just looking up one of my placements in my Natal Chart and was looking at Chiron in Aries in the Sixth house. Apparently, health issues is a big thing for me in this lifetime. I am also positioned to become a healer to others who suffer from the same issues as me. The only way I can make sense of this happening to me is to believe that it is for a reason, and that I am evolving to eat a very healthy diet. Really, I have no choice or I am going to just keep getting worse.

One of the most difficult things for me to deal with is the idea that I have gotten a disease which basically shuts down my metabolism. That is in a lot of ways my worst fear come true. I have always been obsessive about my weight and have stuggled with eating disorders for most of my life. The idea of living my life continually gaining weight with no way of losing it no matter how much I diet or exercise is uncomprehensible to me. To be honest I would rather not live at all of I were to have to live like that.

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Day Four on Synthroid

One of the symptoms of my hypothyroidism is that I wake up in the morning feeling very tired, heavy, and just bad in general. Laying in bed does not even feel good, and it takes a lot of effort to get up. It is particularly worse in the winter because of my cold sensitivity - I cannot stand cold! That is weird because I used to really like cold weather and not be bothered by it all that much.

I take my hormone replacement pill every morning as soon as I wake up, and this morning was the fourth day of taking it. Maybe I am imagining things but I really am starting to feel a lot better. I would not say I am 100% yet better by any means (yesterday I did not feel very good at all) but I feel like I am making progress.

I have yet to completely start my new anti-inflammatory foods only diet. I did quit coffee (yay!) but yesterday I had pizza, beer, and cookies (all no-no) food items because it was around and was New Years Day and all that jazz. Today I am turning a new leaf, though. Santino and I have been trying to clear out all of the "bad" food items this week before we go food shopping tomorrow, and they are all almost gone. I am currently gathering recipes of soups I am going to make this weekend that we will be able to eat all next week. I have been pretty upset that I am having to give up all of my favorite foods, but I am viewing this as an opportunity to become healthier than ever. I know that I will be able to adjust my tastes to enjoy my new diet as much as my old one.

I have an appointment to see the Nutritionist on January 12th to get further guidance and hopefully get switched from Synthroid to Armour Thyroid ( a natural hormone replacement product). I have a lot of supplements/herbs that I need to go get and start taking. I am also researching Acupuncturists who have experience treating hypothyroidism. From all of the research I have been doing, I think I have a very good chance of curing my hypothyroidism if I combine traditional medicinal treatment with alternative therapy. One day I am hoping that my Endocrinologist will tell me that I do not have to take thyroid medicine any longer.

I think that most people never recover from their hypothyroidism because they never make the necessary dietary changes which this condition requires. I have been feeling for the past several years that a switch in my diet will be mandatory to my evolutionary path. It seems as if my body has finally flipped the switch and now I have no choice.  

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